Shutter: Gateway Drug to Comics

This is the worst quality photo I'm so sorry to everyone.

O hai! Happiest of Odin's Day to you all. And how are you this fine November eve? I'm super great! I just got back from hangin' out at Cosmic Monkey Comics, where my friend Leila was doing a signing with Joe (her writer) for their comic Shutter! Volume 1 (a collection of issues 1-6) just came out this week, and having read all six issues pretty much as they came out, I can attest that it is Super Good. With capitals. It's kind of been my gateway drug into comics, which means an awful lot, because I've just recently discovered the wonder that is the world of comics. I can't believe it took me this long to sort my shit out, but at least I finally did!

Omg it's a ninja ghost just for me~

Shutter was the first time I read a comic and was like, "Oh wow, this is a cool story with beautiful art and a rad, engaging protagonist who I want to read about and follow on her adventures! I NEED MORE!" Which is awesome and I'm so grateful for it. Without Leila's friendship and subsequent guidance in my comics journey (she is constantly recommending new comics to us comic noobs, which is fantastic), I don't think I'd be sitting here today in bed, surrounded by finished, half-read, and soon-to-be-read comics while nursing a massive crush on Matt Fraction.

Of course other friends have given recommendations that have been spot on -- Ms. Marvel, Captain Marvel, and Hawkeye anyone?? -- but Shutter started it all, and I have Leila (and Joe!) to thank for that.

Hanging out in a comics shop with some of my best friends and talking comics, warm and cozy while it's blustery and cold outside -- what a lovely end to the day. Now talk comics to me: what do you read? What do you want to read? What do you recommend? Do you want recommendations from me, a comics noob?? Comics! Discuss.

N7 Day Part 2

OKAY I'M SORRY this is another N7 Day post, sue me it happens once a year let me have this. Let me take a bunch of selfies of me and my Shepard tattoo and harass you with them.

Sooo, today has been pretty goddamn great. Like, this might be my second favorite holiday now, tied with Thanksgiving, because let's be reeeaalll Christmas is just completely on another level. Anyway. Today has been wonderful. I wore my N7 shirt (AS U CAN SEE), geeked out with other fans across the interwebs, and of course I made N7 cupcakes all alone all evening Because OBVIOUSLY?

It took me way too long to make these, and this is only half of them, but they were WORTH IT and came out way better than expected as I have pretty much zero experience decorating baked goods with icing?? I'm super proud, regardless! And they taste so good. Dark chocolate fudge frosting, you guys. Dark chocolate fudge.

Anyway just a short lil post this time, but I just... I want to say again, thank you BioWare for creating such a wonderful thing that even my crusty old bitter heart can love so much it consumes me entirely. Thank you for bringing Stacey and me together. Thank you for reconnecting me to old friends. Thank you for making me feel like part of a community of amazingly talented, enthusiastic, and lovely people.

Here's to us! Who's like us? Damn few! And they're all dead.

What N7 Day Means to Me

"What does N7 mean to you?" BioWare asked in a blog post last month in anticipation of November 7th, now celebrated as N7 Day by Mass Effect fans. Well, buckle up, sit back, and get ready because I am going to tell you exactly what N7 means to me!!

We all know by now that I'm a huge fan of this series. I got an N7 tattoo immediately after finishing the game, and a half sleeve of Commander Shepard shortly after that. I'M A LITTLE OBSESSED. This game showed me a female character who I love more than anything. It introduced me to a fictional world that is so vivid and engaging that it's real to me. It's part of me.

But what N7 really really means to me, even more than the deep (and frankly impossible-to-express-in-mere-words) way it touched me, is connection. It means discovering an incredibly vast and welcoming fan base of people who are just as in love with the Mass Effect series, are just as emotionally invested, and wanna bang Garrus just as much as I do. Being a fan is more than just enthusiasm about the game. It's about sharing the experience with people who have that same enthusiasm, and letting that excitement bounce back and forth and grow into art, music, stories, conversation, whatever, inspired by this one thing we all love together.

Which brings me to the best, best thing I got out of the ridiculously intense emotional experience that was my first playthrough of Mass Effect. And by "thing" I mean person. And by person I mean Stacey. It's Stacey. Stacey is the best thing to come of Mass Effect for me, let's be real. Have you ever had the experience of meeting someone who you immediately get along with, who has the exact same stupid sense of humor as you, who understands all of your weird-as-shit personality quirks because they have those same quirks, and who just gets you? 100%? That's Stacey. I've never even met her in real life and we've only known each other for a short time, but I trust her as much as I trust family. It feels like we've been friends our whole lives.

I feel super lucky to have multiple girl friends who are like sisters to me, who I would kill and die for, and who I would trust with my life and all of my darkest, weirdest secrets. Stacey is now one of them (a friend, not a weird secret). She could call me in the middle of the night and ask me to drive through the night to LA and help her hide the body of the man she just murdered, and I would do it. No question. I'd engage in fisticuffs for her. No seriously, I would take a punch in the face. I'd also give as many punches in the face as I could manage with my very limited reach. And I'd play any goddamn video game she wanted me to, just to talk to her while doing multiplayer. EVEN SCARY ONES. Even Call of Duty.

And the thing is, Stacey is the one person I lived Mass Effect with. We played it almost in tandem; I finished the game after her, but she stayed up until 3:00 in the morning the day I finished so she could talk me down when I lost all of my shit as the credits rolled. She understood completely every ridiculous Mass Effect-related thought I had, every moment that upset me or made me laugh or made me cry. You know how at the end of Speed, Keanu Reeves says to Sandra Bullock, "I've heard relationships based on intense experiences never work"? Well he was DEAD WRONG because going through one of the most intense emotional experiences I've ever endured (aside from like, you know, breakups and the deaths of loved ones I guess, although this weirdly comes close?) with Stacey forged our bond like the One Ring in the fires of Mount Doom. Which means it's strong. It's a strong-as-fuck bond.

I used to be so worried that as we stopped replaying and replaying Mass Effect and moved on to other things, that our friendship would fade or diminish in some way. But it's only gotten stronger as we discover new things we have in common, and are continually reminded how similar we are. I just love her so much, you guys. It's stupid. And I may never have realized just how much I love her without Mass Effect.

So thank you, Mass Effect. Thank you Commander Shepard. Thank you Biotic God, thank you Thane in the vents, thank you "behind the crates", thank you Kaidan's scream in London, thank you Wrex cosplayer with the tiny arms. Thank you BioWare, you fucking brilliant assholes. N7 means the world to me because N7 means Stacey.

Love you, bae.

Xbox in Bed

Lolololol I spent three hours today rearranging my room and cleaning shit so I'd be able to move my Xbox in here for the winter. It gets mad cold out in the living room and our power bills in the winter are humongo, so as much as I love the idea of playing DA:I in fingerless hobo gloves and like four onesies layered on top of each other, I decided that a move to the bedroom would be the most prudent course of action. My room has its own thermostat, so I can turn on the heat until it warms up in here and turn it off again, and it'll stay a lot warmer than the big ol' un-insulated living room! Hooray for not dying of hypothermia!

Please ignore my wrinkly-ass bedding and limp pillows. This isn't some lifestyle blog with curated photos of my IKEA black and white chevron rug! This is real life. And in real life my bed looks like shit I guess.

Also please ignore my new Dell. What, a PC? Me? Naahhh. *sobs gently into limp pillows*

Anyway I would update you on what I did today, but I worked for eight hours and then cleaned for three more and now it's bedtime, aka time to read Hawkeye, so there's not much on which to update you. Next time, though: COMICS UPDATE! Maybe? If I feel like it.

Lyall says goodnight.

Best Halloween

We were supposed to be protecting Rose, the rat, but instead it looks like I'm attacking her violently.

I'm gonna go right ahead and say it: Halloween this year was the best Halloween I've had in recent memory! For real! I can't even think of a Halloween that was better. So I guess that means it's the best Halloween OF ALL TIME? Yes. Best of All Time.

I mean last Halloween was sort of okay because the office I worked in at the time was full of super geeky, awesome people who invited me to join their Clue-themed costume extravaganza, so that was fun! But I was still feeling sad about my breakup and I think probably went home and watched Pacific Rim and moped that night. So it's not very hard for Halloween 2014 to be better than Halloween 2013, but I feel like even if last Halloween wasn't depressing, it could never have lived up to this year's!

Trio o' heroes!

So let's go over Halloween 2014! My friends are perfect, to start. Megan, Georgia, and I dressed as Marvel heroes (Megan is Spider-Man in child-sized gloves and socks, Georgia is Thor, and I'm Captain America), and Rose dressed as a plague rat (her husband was a plague doctor but did not really take part in our festivities last night and is thus not pictured). We hung out and talked for hours at Georgia's and then went down to the Triple Nickel, a divey bar across the street, where I won a raffle and got a free drink WOOHOO!! And while dancing to Taylor Swift near the end of the night, clutching my child's shield and sweating profusely, I just felt so happy to be surrounded by friends who get me and are super super fun to be around no matter how introvert-y I may feel at a given time. Even if we had just spent the entire night eating Goldfish crackers and drinking wine in Georgia's place I would have had The Most Fun! I love these people. I love them a lot.

But let's not forget the office Halloween party, because that was also INCREDIBLE okay. I never knew work holidays could be so much fun?? Almost everybody dressed up, there was so much good food and a laser light show and a pumpkin pinata and a Scary Room with full-sized candy bars in the Scary Cauldron and favor bags and a bunch of people who I love being around for 40 hours every week! The whole day was so much fun it just sped by, and I was weirdly almost sad to go home at the end of the day, like when does that ever happen? Hashtag blessed.

The only down side of Halloween was the sheer amount of food I ate, which was probably my entire weight in junk?? And therefore I was sober all goddamn night. All night! Usually I'm a huge lightweight but I was stone cold sober pretty the whole time. All those Cheetos absorbed the booze. Not that it stopped me from dancing for hours and having the most fun time ever, but still! Lame.

I hope you all had Halloweens as fun as mine! What did you dress up as? Did you overeat and wanna hurl all day? The important questions. YAY HALLOWEEN 2014!!

Deep Thoughts With SG-1

As you may know, I've started watching Stargate SG-1 again from the beginning. Which is no simple feat, might I point out. There are 10 seasons, with 214 episodes total, each about an hour long. So there is a lot of it. But I am ready! 100%! I just love it so, so much. And I actually -- I'm so sorry, please don't hate me -- forgot about Jonas Quinn until like five minutes ago?? I'M SORRY okay he's just not in it for very long, and he's overshadowed in my mind by Ben Browder and Claudia Black, and like, he shows up in that weird period where Daniel's gone, which was so painful for me and I still have PTSD flashbacks of Daniel's terrible thick rib ascension sweater, and it's been like five years since I watched it okay, shut up Lee. I know you're reading this.

Stargate isn't just a show for me, though. I mean it is just a show (shut up Meg stop being so pretentious), and it's entertaining and fun and emotionally engaging as hell, and I absolutely beyond adore the characters (except apparently Jonas "Forgettable" Quinn), but I'm only a few episodes into season 1 and it's already packed a pretty hefty emotional punch for me. Well. Maybe not a punch, because that implies violence. But it's emotional. An emotional... hug? This is mainly because I've watched all 214 of the episodes of the show twice now, some of them more than twice, but until now, every single episode of SG-1 I'd ever watched had been with Greg. 

I wasn't expecting to think about him as much as I have been as I begin to re-watch these episodes. But I do. And it's not a bad thing; it's comforting, even. I can remember how he reacted to certain moments. I can hear him laughing, or being annoyed at a plot inconsistency (which was all the time with Greg), or making his usual smart-ass comments. I remember exactly what he said when he noticed that Daniel had his own distinct way of talking, for example. The thing is, a year ago these memories would have been painful, if not unbearable. But now they're not. Now they're... nice? 

I feel like a weirdo saying that, but it's true! It reminds me of a time when Greg and I worked really, really well together. When we wanted the same things, liked all the same things, laughed at the same things, and just fit together really well. Because we did, for most of the time we were together. I mean we sat in our shitty tiny basement apartment in Missoula and watched every episode of SG-1 together, in order, twice. (And all of Stargate Atlantis.) We were happy just being around each other no matter where we were or what we were doing. And we had so much fun! It was a really easy, happy place for me. 

Remembering it doesn't hurt anymore, and that's amazing to me. I like feeling grateful for all the happiness and companionship Greg and I shared. It meant, and still means, a lot to me. So re-watching Stargate SG-1 isn't a painful experience, but a happy one. It reminds me of the content, comfortable moments I spent with someone I loved. I'm so glad we had each other for that time, because my experiences are richer now because of it. 

Not just in watching Stargate, although that's part of it. Living in a world where I used to love Greg, learned from him, and now am thankful for that time -- it's a good world. He helped shape the person I am today, and that will always, always mean something to me.

Who is Dr. Strange Though

So BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH as Dr. Strange, amirite!? Best news of the day, RIGHT? ...Not that I received any other news today, really, except that my N7 shirt and mug had shipped. BUT BEST NEWS THO!

I only have... one small question, a bit of a minor one, but, uh. Who's Dr. Strange?

I'M SORRY OKAY I don't know anything about comics! I didn't even know we were awaiting a casting choice for this guy, that's how oblivious I've been. But now I have a sudden and vested interest in this Dr. Strange fellow. And so, as of this very moment, I am about to embark on a Google search that will reveal the answers to me! But before I do, I'm gonna go ahead and say that my educated guess is that Dr. Strange is an amalgam of Doctor Who and Dr. Strangelove, so like a British guy in a black and white film, dressed eccentrically, traveling through time and space astride an atomic bomb. SUPER CLOSE I bet?

*performs Google search*

Okay, well. I wasn't that far off, I mean clothes-wise... but who CARES about that because holy shit, guys! Dr. Strange is THE COOLEST! I didn't even know!! Did you? Okay check this out:

!!!!! He's a neurosurgeon. Not only is he a goddamn practicing sorcerer but the Sorcerer Supreme, PRIMARY PROTECTOR OF EARTH AND A NEUROSURGEON?? I'm pregnant with his babies already. Leave me to die, there's no hope for me. Leave me I tell you! I can go no further!

...Look at his power stance though. Imagine Benedict in such a stance. Do you think he'll wear those tights and fashion-forward cape for fall? I can't take it! I just can't!

Seriously though, this is just great, now I have to figure out where to start in Thor and Dr. Strange now, not that I don't already have a heaping pile of comics to read before I die, all of which I'm sure I'll never successfully finish. Life is so goddamn difficult, guys! Mostly due to Benedict Cumberbatch! If only he had never been born!!

*weeps forever*