Monday, August 4, 2014

20 Stupid Thoughts: Guardians of the Galaxy


Here are 20 stupid thoughts I have about Guardians of the Galaxy. Which, by the way, is an A+ 5 out of 5 stars awesome movie that everybody should watch right now and that I would like to see again ASAP. So much so that I used the acronym "ASAP"!! Seriously this movie though. Here are my thoughts that I wrote down as I came up with them so it's pretty much the worst review/reaction post of all time. You're welcome.

1. Chris Pratt, the perfect mix of hot and hilarious. I knew he was hot now but he is so hot now. Great, all of my love interests are not denizens of this earth (and are not real people). Wrap me in your strong arms, Star-Lord. Asshole.

2. Gamora and Peter never kiss!!! I like it. More like this please, Hollywood and the world. (Titan A.E. already got the memo.)

3. The part with Groot almost made me weep openly. Which part you ask? IT DOESN'T MATTER. All of them.

4. Footloose though.

5. Just that whole scene on Xandar where everyone is chasing/shooting at/trying to capture each other is frankly beyond words so I won't say any.

6. Rocket is so angry and sarcastic but so sensitive on the inside! He doesn't even know what a raccoon is!! He talks to Groot like Han Solo talks to Chewbacca, which is cray because Groot only says "I am Groot"! What a crazy raccoon/tree duo!!

7. GROOOOOT.

8. Can we talk about how this movie achieves the perfect balance of comedy, action, emotional depth, and badass visuals? I laughed, I cried, I enjoyed myself so fucking much.

9. That weird thing the guy wants to put on his spaceship dashboard???

10. Rocket's cheek fur is all smashed when he wakes up though.

11. KAREN GILLAN. Damn is she gorgeous no matter what you do to her. Marry me and be in every movie I watch from now on? Thank you.

12. Rocket whenever he has a big gun and is firing it though!

13. The soundtrack; can we talk about the soundtrack?

14. Lee Pace is only doing movies where he can be an over-the-top ham with fabulous headwear from now on.

15. Peter Quill is not 100% a dick.

16. "Ain't no thing like me, except me!"AHAHA WHAT'S THAT ROCKET? Tell me again. Angrily.

17. "I wasn't listening. I was thinking of something else."

18. ROCKET'S LIL FACE AND HIS LIL JUMPSUIT AND HIS LIL RACOON EARS THO

19. Drax stroking Rocket's ears though ahahahaaaaaahahaaa I'm not hysterical.

20. I HAVE A CRUSH ON A CGI RACCOON OKAY ARE YOU HAPPY NOW

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