Monday, March 11, 2013

Outfit no. 54

Skirt, sweater, and hat: H&M; shirt: Primark; shoes: Payless; necklace: gift from Dad; glasses: Ray-Ban

I'm both dreading and looking forward to summer right now. But let's be honest... I'm mostly dreading it. I get headaches just from thinking about being outside in the sun, let alone experiencing it. I'm about as close to a vampire as somebody can come without actually feeding on blood and being immortal. Which is a funny, dumb thing to tell people when I'm attempting to explain why I hate sunlight and blue skies, but it's worryingly true. Sunlight does give me headaches, and if I'm out in it for more than 10 or 15 minutes, I often start to get nauseous. And left to my own devices, I will inevitably revert to a nocturnal lifestyle. Almost the whole time I lived in London I was up until 5 or 6 in the morning writing, and I'd go to bed when the din of songbirds became too loud to justify staying up any longer. I'd work most days from 1:30 to 3 or 4pm, and then I'd take a nap. Around midnight I'd make coffee and settle in for a night of writing. And poor Shaun had to put up with me whenever I went out into the light, all pale and blinking and confused.

That said, how could I be looking forward to summer at all, you may ask? Because beer gardens. That is pretty much the only reason. And also... actually, no, I can't think of another reason. I despise summer! Not only is it hot and sweaty and sunny and horrible, but you have to go around with bare legs and arms and if there's anything worse than being out in the sun, it's being out in the sun with bare legs. I envy girls who look forward to shedding their tights and embracing shorts and mini-skirts -- damn you all! That's the main motivation for my diet. I want to feel un-ugly when I'm forced to emerge from my den come summer. And it really sucks right now, because I'm DYING for a cake donut. :|

If I could, I'd totally summer in Siberia or Antarctica or something, and just sit in a snowsuit and drink hot cocoa and read. That sounds amazing right now. Man, why can't I just be a proper vampire? Then I'd have to stay inside during the day and I wouldn't be forced to deal with the dreaded sun. Boo.

Anyway, wow, welcome to Rant About Summer, population: me. Am I the only one who dreads this season so much it kind of makes me feel ill? Fellow vampires, let us band together and bemoan the sun together! Swimsuits are the worst! How dare anyone have fun and frolic on the beach! Sweater weather 4ever! Etc.

1 comment:

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