Today's outfit looked a lot better in person than in photos. At least that's what I told myself as I went through the 100+ crappy pictures I took. I think from now on we don't pair the loose, cropped sweaters with tight hip-hugging skirts. Because... it does not show off the bits of my body that I would like to show off, and then it shows off the parts I want to hide. Bah! Oh well, I felt badass all day, so I guess that's all that matters!
I'm wearing: H&M sweater, F21 skirt and earrings, necklace from Mom.
I'm also wearing the black boots from DSW. In case you were curious about how my look was ~completed~.
So yeah, boohoo, I'm PMSing and everything is making me feel ugly and irritable. In the spirit of being irritable, then, I shall talk about some weird blogging "etiquette" things that are either confusing me or annoying me lately. Firstly, what's the deal with commenting? I feel like a ton of the comments I get are from people just flitting from blog to blog, leaving brief-ass comments so they'll get a visit and a comment (and a follow??) in return. Case in point, recently I went through the comments in one of my posts and checked out the blogs I'd never visited before. I left comments on some of the ones I particularly liked, because I felt like leaving a comment. Then, like the next day, those same people came back and commented on my blog, saying stuff like "hey great blog, glad I found it" or something, as though they didn't remember coming here before and commenting? I mean I don't exactly care, it's not like my blog is totally memorable, and yeah I'll go to somebody's blog and forget about it later so it's not like I'm mad, expecting them to remember me OMG I'm so great... no. It's just that it makes their commenting motives clear: they don't comment because they really like my blog, they do it because... probably they want me to visit their blog in return.
This is a practice that I see a lot of in the land of style blogs. People just throwing dime-a-dozen comments out there like crazy, hoping to gather more traffic that way. Which is fine, and if they want to do that, more power to them. I guess what worries me is that, if these comment-whores do end up leaving a comment on my blog, am I required to comment back? I notice a lot of bloggers replying in kind to such comments, but honestly, I don't. It's not because I'm trying to be a bitch, I just don't have time. And to be frank, I only comment on blogs that interest me, and on posts that actually make me want to leave feedback. I don't want to just leave some hollow blurb like "cute pics xo," a completely forgettable and useless comment in my opinion. Some may like those comments, but I'd rather be thoughtful and genuine with mine. I guess lately I'm just worried people will somehow notice that I'm not like, commenting on their blog every time I get a comment, or something, but that's just not how I roll! I comment how and when I like! I'm sorry if you leave comments here wanting me to follow your blog, seriously, but I will only do so if I feel like it and your blog is awesome. The end. That is my disclaimer. Now I won't feel like a total ass if I fail to comment on people's blogs. (Not; I always feel like an ass.)
Wow, rant much. But seriously this is bugging me lately! Another thing that bugs me is that sometimes I'll find a blog that has really great photos, and a cool layout and whatever, but for some reason or other the blogger herself just rubs me the wrong way and I can't follow her blog. This bugs me because it makes me feel bitchy, but seriously... I can't be friends with everyone, right? Or am I just crazy! Does this happen to anybody else?
Wow what an elitist, complainy post. I really don't mean it this way; I'm just trying to open up some of my blogging concerns and see if I'm alone here. I'm sure there are plenty of people who think I'm super annoying or my writing style is stupid or whatever, which is cool! That's how life works and such. (I just hope they won't leave bitchy anon comments ever.) So yeah. Hmmm. Deep thoughts with Meg.
40 comments:
Meg, seriously great post and well put. I've recently been experiencing a lot of those two-worded comments accompanied by a link. Or something else I constantly get "Hey I'll follow you if you follow me!" This really makes me sad! I comment and follow blogs I genuinely love. If I comment on some of my favorite blogs, I don't expect them to run over to my blog and comment back or follow me! That's not how this works. I write my blog for myself and for the people who are genuine and can relate to me! If someone "loves" my blog, they can follow and comment. I'll visit your blog and follow or comment if I like your content.
Blah. Anyway, I don't know why you feel the need to hide your hips. Seriously, you're so tiny! You're a beaut, m'dear! I think you look amazing and I've currently been obsessed over the cropped tops/skirts deal. I just bought a body con skirt and was like "holy hips" when I looked in the mirror! Girls are so critical of themselves I guess. Either way, you look awesome!
This rant pretty much summarizes the most irritating part of blogging. I genuinely like leaving comments on blogs that I like, and I love reading through genuine comments on my blog. But it pisses me off to NO END when people leave comments like "Nice blog, follow me back?" It just comes off seeming so desperate! If they have to BEG people to visit their blog, then it must not be a very good blog anyway. I won't follow somebody just for the sake of getting a few more visits every day, and I'm not going to comment on some douchebag's page just so they'll return the favor. Maybe that's *~the way of the blogosphere~*, but it seems so fake.
You are completely right on this. I was just thinking about this this morning actually. And yesterday. I had someone comment on my resolutions post today where I recapped my 2010 resolutions and how I did with them and also my 2011 ones. The person obviously scanned the post, said good luck doing a resolution I had ALREADY achieved last year and then asked me to follow. UGH.
And yesterday, someone commented on my looks I love post and said that I was really cute and that they loved my looks. UM HELLO? Obviously they didn't care to notice that wasn't me! It's so irritating when people comment on my blog just to expect a comment back.
I try to comment back on my readers blog, just because I'm interested and appreciate that they visited. But I won't leave a comment for the sake of commenting and I won't follow someone for the sake of following. When I follow a new blog, I like to tell the person I follow it just so they can know that I appreciate their content and to keep it up. Never do I expect them to even visit my blog in return.
I just really hate these "Love your blog. I'm following. Follow back?" comments. They make me extra NOT want to follow that persons blog. As if the only point of blogging is to gain followers. What am I supposed to tell them "congrats person, I'm a follower and you now have a million followers. How does this make your life or blog any better?" It doesn't. It's a number. Go die. (not really, but I really hate those kinds of comments)
Sorry for the rant back. Great post though lady.
Someone should make a style blogging website with a list of links of bloggers that do this. Then these bloggers can visit this website and all just follow each other. Boom, problem postponed, but not solved. Haha.
Totally get what you're saying! I used to be way too focused on getting followers/comments/hits/etc. Now I'm trying to focus on blogging for me, for fun and in my spare time to make REAL connections with the few bloggers who I really enjoy and feel that I relate to, rather than just focusing on numbers and feeling the need to be constantly commenting/updating etc. Being real is much more rewarding in the end!
Also, I like your sweater!
Hey, at least you get those. I have no valid traffic. Now, mind you, the last post I made before the one I made at the end of the year was from early November, but even with my summer project it was prob so lame that no one looked at it, even after failing at trying to push it on Chictopia.
Now I only get visitors who were searching for the phrase "Halak-ness Monster" attempting to find the new "Halak-NET Monster" t-shirt that some St. Louis' Blues fan drew up. :( It is sad. (Especially since the t-shirt looks godawful lame and the fan probably stole the nickname from me, anyway.)
This is the second post of yours that I just want to jump up and start clapping.
When I first started blogging, I did leave those short snippet comments, but only because I didn't know what all to say in them.... and considering 3/4 of the other commenters I saw were leaving the short comments themselves, I thought it was appropriate. However, I've found that once I've really gotten into the whole blogging scene and gotten to know some of the bloggers I follow, the longer, more genuine comments become easier to write.
That however doesn't mean the copy&paste comment whores aren't out there. Heather's example of "I'll follow you if you follow me" comments are the best way to spot them. People need to get a clue that this isn't about the numbers. It's about finding an outlet to express yourself. If you like it, follow... but what do you get out of "blackmailing" people to follow you? Lol. Silly, silly, silly.
Don't feel like a bitch for not following bloggers without personality, because I do the same. I just recently filtered out some bloggers with hella nice pictures, but little to no content or personality in their writing. Im one of those people who have to be able to relate to the person I'm reading about otherwise it's just not going to happen. So, if you're a bitch.. then I'm a bitch, and we can live in bitchdom together.
Pardon me while I hop off the soap box and comment on something more fashionable.
Cropped sweaters <3<3<3<3 I think this is more flattering on you than you think. I blame the hormones, because this outfit is cute! As long as it makes you feel like a bad ass, that's all that matters. Most important part of an outfit is how it makes you feel :D
Alyssa
Hahaha, I love this post! I've been visiting your blog for a while and love your posts (I don't have a blog of my own though :P) I know exactly what you mean about bloggers that rub you the wrong way...I read a lot of style blogs and some of them have the best layouts ever, but I read some posts and immediately feel like throwing my computer out the window in anger. It doesn't make you a bad person...I don't think we're meant to like everyone we come across...
Blogging is all about personality! What works for some people might not be appealing for you... at least that's how I justify my irrational dislike of some bloggers. It's not like I'm going to go leave anonymous comments on their blogs telling them that they're ugly, because they're not, they're just not in line with my own personal preferences.
Back when I had a blog and was trying to get some more traffic I tried to leave more comments, but it was so hard! It always takes me like 15 minutes to write one because if I find something I like enough to talk about then I just keep going, and going, and going...
The comments I hated the most, though, were the ones about contests. Seriously? Like I really care.
That necklace is brilliant! I love it. Also, thanks to you I got my boyfriend to watch Sherlock with me and we both loved it! The long wait for the next series frustrates me, however. Boo.
My turn to rant.
Comments are nice, and it's nice to be appreciated, but it KILLS me when people leave comments just to gain readershop. I know I'm not the first, nor will I be the last to say it, but comment on my post if you feel the need to contribute or if you genuinely like the content. Heck, even if you DON'T like the content, comment in a constructive way to give me some advice.
//FLASHBACK//
I remember when I did a post about the anniversary of my grandpa's death. Eventually, I just took it down. I posted a ton about how hearbreaking it was, how upset my family was, how difficult it must've been for my grandma (they'd been married since they were sixteen!).
And then I posted a picture of a beautiful gal putting flowers on a grave.
I got SO many responses of "aw, so cute. Lovely photoshoot at the grave." Uh--- that WASN'T EVE ME. It's so frustrating when people comment just to receive comments- it's kind of insulting. Not gonna lie, I love gaining readership as much as the next girl, but really!?
It got to the point where I took the post down because there I was, pouring my heart out, and (mostly!) all I had were "so cute, lovely dress" comments. It felt disrespectful to his memory.
I did get some genuine support, and those gals really did brighten my day, but it's a dime a dozen now. I'm lucky now, however. My support system through the blogger community has grown profusely, but I suppose that means the spam/follow me comments will continue to grow.
ANYHOW
Now for YOUR post.
You look so darling-- so artsy. I think that's what I love most about your personal style; you are expressive, not afraid to limit yourself, but still effortlessly artsy! You are a gem! (I say that WAAAY too much. Maybe my NewYears resolution should be to cut back on the word 'gem'..)
Now, shall I scold you about not wanting to show off your body? Or would that be pushing it...? Hmh.. well without saying anything, I'm thinking VERY loudly.
Yes, you know what I'm thinking. ROCK IT! Then again, PMSing sucks. I always feel like a linebacker that time of the month..
Sorry for the novel.
That's a lie. I'm glad I wrote this all in response to your post. Great post. :) I do however, apologize for all the type-o's I know are in this post.
first - I think you look great today and I love the skirt/sweater combo :) Also the necklace because it rocks.
On the commenting thing...
I comment rarely.
I really only commment if I have something to say because reading "great post" or things of that nature gets boring *for me* when I read comments on other's blogs.
So yeah. I read, I think - sometimes I comment. I don't expect my readers to comment every time they read one of my posts, either.
Especially because some of my readers are my grandmas and great-aunts and they don't really "get" the commenting thing anyway ^.^
I think you might have telepathic powers, I feel like you have hit on something many of us bloggers have been wondering.
Seriously, it's HARD WORK to comment, go through blogs, appreciate them...we don't have the time! And comments should be genuine, not this fake thing that doesn't actually mean anything.
You should have rants more often, they're enlightening and marvelous.
Thank you!
holy crap! this post is awesome, as are the comments. i agree with heather, amanda, and alyson with the whole "cool blog i'm following follow back" thing. it drives me crazy and i want to leave rant-y comments on their blogs! i am, however, a lame commenter sometimes :\ whether i'm busy or just lazy. i need to get better about that...shame on me!
anyway, i quite enjoy your outfit. i think the skirt and sweater look amazing on you!
luv ur blog follow back plz? ;)
MEG!
i agree with EVERYTHING you just said in your amazing rant.
i really do not care about the 2 word comments as much as i DISLIKE when bloggers say "follow me, i will follow you?"
everytime i read this i feel like i am in high school again.
i do not do my blog to see how many followers i can get...like it is a popularity contest.
thank you thank you thank you for saying this.
i have always wanted to write about this..BUT i am a horrible writer.
everytime i comment on someone's blog, i mean every word i say. (even though i use the word LOVE way to much.)
i think we should come up with a blog badge/button that says.."i ban the phrase following you, follow me?"
anyways...you should hide nothing.... you are beautiful!!! the black and white is perfect on you.
keep on ranting love.
i <3 your blog and you.
xoox
ps. i agree on your formspring answer.
david is amazing BUT matt smith is dreamy. <3
you know I used to be one of those dime a dozen comment makers. and then I realised I was just burning myself out and my blog suffered. As a result I hardly ever blog anymore and I also never check back on blogs which I really genuinely love. This is the first time I've come back into the blogosphere in quite awhile and it is quite refreshing to just go and read the blogs in which I truly enjoy and comment where I see fit.
MORE POWER TO YOU GIRLFRIEND.
i've been getting really forceful comments lately, it's so annoying! like, "HI, YOUR BLOG IS NICE, FOLLOW ME NOW" and then they post their blog link like ten times, just in case i didn't see it the first time. i immediately delete comments like that, i just think it's SO rude and not at all what commenting/blogging is about. it's just... not cool. at all. genuine comments, for the win.
on a more positive note, i continue to enjoy your blog more and more and more, and i REALLY love your outfit here. <3
I just wanted to tell you that I follow your blog specifically because I truly love your fashion style and writing style. When I first found you, I couldn't help but smile because I make my own felt bow ties and rock them in a small town that doesn't even sell bow ties. It felt nice to find someone who also loves different things. So even if my comments are small, please know that I check your bog as much as possible not because I want traffic, but because I truly love your blog. Just wanted you to know.
ps. I have been dying to try the cropped loose sweater, and I think you nailed it. You look amazing.
Great blog! Follow me?
Totally joking-- and I feel your pain! What it is is SPAMMING. If it isn't relevant to your post or you, delete it. I learned this the hard way-- a girl kept commenting on my blog... little flitty comments... and eventually got a little crazy and angry because I didn't follow her yet. It was weird.
You look great! I can't even tell you are PMSing! Such a pretty, fun girl you are.
This is a very interesting rant for me because I just began leaving comments on blogs. 90% of the blogs I follow in my GoogleReader I have been following for months now but have never commented. I never know what to say: 'Wow you're photography/editing skills are amazing', 'that outfit is super cute, i want that (insert article of clothing here) so bad!' , etc etc. Plus, I have to scroll back up through the reader post, and then click the post title link to get to the blog, then find the comment form, etc just to tell them that yes they do look cute and yes I am envious. So I just read read read.
But lately as I have been in the process of posting less random stuff and mp3s on my blog to posting more outfit photos and such, I have felt the need to actually begin commenting to all the girls that have been such an inspiration to me. Girls like you! I have always wanted to do a style blog, but haven't felt I had a great enough camera or enough time. But since I really wanted to try it, I have jumped in head first. I still don't always know what to say in comments, but I would like to say something just so that girls know I'm reading. I obviously don't have a huge following yet, and perhaps I never will, it isn't really the goal of my blog in the first place. I would like it though if people who did read it commented, just so I knew I wasn't talking to myself hahah. Probably with as big of a readership as yours, you just assume people are reading what you're writing, whether or not they comment. Consider yourself lucky in that aspect.
One way to help this is to add a like button to your posts, this way if people dont really have anything pertinent to say, they can still just like the post and give you positive feedback that way. Another blogger I have been following for awhile Lily, introduced the idea here: http://www.llymlrs.com/2010/12/sunday-portrait-week-56.html
I will still be reading, and will probably still be commenting, and even commenting lame things like "hey qtπ" because I can't help it!
Well I am glad you posted this haha because it is something that I have always thought but never really expressed online out of fear that nobody would share the same sentiment. Props for having more metaphorical balls than me. If someone comments on my blog with some short meaningless comment I almost never comment back on their blog unless I really like their blog (which is not often the case). I comment on blogs if I am into them. That's it.
Anyway, suffice to say I am really into your blog. On a slightly related note, I just recently watched Sherlock and loved it! Does Sherlock remind you of Paul Dano? He so reminds me of Paul Dano - his face anyway.
Annnd finally, I hate it when I love an outfit and then photograph it and don't like it anymore but whether you like it or not I love it! I'm a big fan of that sweater.
xo Robyn
Firstly I love your outfit!
Secondly I love you more every time I read one of your posts! :) This post is amazing! There are people out there that dont put any thought into their comments and like you I dont respond in kind as that's not me. I like to read and put thought into what I say and if I get a read and a comment back than that's an awesome bonus :)
Oh and you cant like everyone and the blogging world isn't an exception to the rule!
deng girl. if you look better in person than in photos, you must've looked deng good. i love your outfit. booty isn't always a bad thing. ;)
haha, ok. & i just finished reading your blog post and i hope that that initial comment didn't fall into the annoying category.
i used to do the 'always comment back' thing and it just took way too much time and i didn't even really mesh well/really understand some of the blogs and it was really troublesome. but, i felt obligated! and then i e-mailed elsiecake (abeautifulmess.typepad.com) and she said that i should only comment on blogs that i actually like. so, now i do. and i know it sounds like i'm just doing that bc she told me to, but she has like a million followers and is a super successful blogger, so i trust her.
anyways, only comment on blogs you like! keep it reallll!
p.s. i really like your blog + style. i found you through lookbook via portland, oregon. grew up in the city. glad to find someone with good style who consistently documents it.
happy new year! :)
Your outfit is adorable in these photos :-)
I guess it's better to get the "cute blog xo" comments that anonymous haters though, right? I've heard a bunch of bloggers talk about that. I totally know what you mean though. I had someone post "nice resolutions" when I didn't post any on my last post. What can you do ;-)
Happy Happy New Year lady!
Yeah, lots of bloggers do that. I think it's nice when people follow you back but I don't like the thought they are doing it out of some misguided necessity; I follow who I like and comment on who I like, and if that person is also a follower then that's just fine ^_^ You look lovely, by the way x
brilliant post - youve touched on some really important issues
and i love these earrings your wearing :)
You look awesome. Love everything about this.
And I totally agree with you. I can't bear comments that don't actually say anything, other than a blog link. So irritating. I never click on the blogs that do that. Give me some heartfelt words, BITCHEZ, then I'll visit you.
So this seems to be a very popular post of yours, eh? I worry about the people who just post comments to comment (ie "I <3 your skirt!") and it seems to only make them seem less interesting. Why follow someone else's blog when they can't write a proper sentence. Sometimes when a "popular" blogger is popular it's due to that certain j'ne sais quoi..not because they comment on 500 blogs a month or something crazy like that.
I only comment when I have something worth saying :P Whenever I write a measly few sentences in a comment I feel bad, and worry it's not enough!
I have received comments off people like 'nice blog btw!' then they throw in 'ENTER MY GIVEAWAY' at the end. It really puts me off because it just seems quite desperate for a blogger to do that D: I'd rather they not comment at all if the main reason for the comment was just to throw advertisement in my face! Luckily I have a few lovely followers who actually take the time to read my posts and reply with something relevant :) xxx
I've been getting some I'll follow you, if you follow me comments. And I have to say, I don't like them. They annoy me. Don't follow me because I followed you. Follow me because you are interested in what I have to say.
And I think you look adorable in this and badass too! Being PMSy always makes me cranky and feel like nothing fits or looks good. PMS sucks ass.
I agree with your commenting rant. I only follow/comment on blogs I really like or can relate to. And yes, some bloggers just rub me the wrong way too.
I always get paranoid about followers. Like, OMG you're following me?! Do I have to follow you too? Ugh, blog stress.
But I really like this outfit! When I saw the first pic I said to myself "Ugh why didn't I wear this outfit first? I love it."
See dear you are too cute, I think the proportions of the outfit look great on you!
on the aforementioned rant, I have a problem with commenting. See I usually read blogs on my iPhone and though I can read and "star" things I like it's nearly impossible to comment (maybe I haven't found the right rss app?) So I star things for me to go back and comment... and guess what. I forget. And I feel bad. I don't want people who comment on my blog to not think I care, I just really sometimes don't get around to it! But hey spamming is spamming, it happens... But you know I hardly ever get spammed comments because maybe my blog isn't that enjoyable, I don't know. I don't really have many of the same issues because my readership is so low and I sometime think I post too much, haha... I don't know I personally would never spam people's blogs to get more readers but readership does make you feel a bit better.
And my word verification is adomolo, which I think could be a cross breed of an armadillo and a mole. What do you think? :)
First of all, this outfit is SO cute, and I think you are just jaded from looking through so many photos and that's why you think it doesn't look nice. Don't worry it happens to me too. hehe
Secondly... I AGREE 100 PERCENT WITH YOUR RANT (as per usual). I get those kind of comments all the time! They're all like "cute skirt xoxoxo follow my blog" and I'm like "yeah thanks but they're shorts and I guess you didn't even look very close and also linking to your blog does not make me wanna link to your blog so there". And then I feel mean after thinking these things, but this doesn't stop me from thinking them.
Also, I agree that sometimes I'll start following a blog because their photos are so nice, and then after a week or two I'll realize that I never actually read their posts so I stop following. I think this is fine. I mean, sometimes people just don't jive.
PS XOXO FOLLOW MY BLOG!
So, there's totally no way this outfit makes your body look weird btw....its very cute!
Also, I think that blogging is something you do for yourself. I mean, don't get me wrong, of course followers are great and everyone wants them because I guess that means you're interesting or have great style? But, it's completely weird to ask someone to follow your blog. The, what's the meaning of getting followers in the first place?
Then, of course, there are those that go too far in the other direction by pretending that blogger is their personal (and explicit) diary and no one else can see it....
Anyway, totally agree with you and if I was someone with a ton of followers, it would be very deeply annoying to sort through nonsense comments every outfit post!!
I think this outfit looks really well proportioned, actually. I like the monochrome palette, and stripes are always my favourite!
I agree with the second part of your rant, about beautiful blogs with bloggers who just don't grab your interest. I think that's the beauty of the internet though, you can pick and choose, and there's so much out there that there's bound to be plenty you DO like. Also, you can always skim the written parts of blogs and just enjoy the photos if you can't bring yourself to not follow a blog like that...=P
Another thing I've been thinking about style blogs is the whole 'community' aspect of it. I mean, you need to build a readership, of course, but how do you find new and interesting ways of commenting on people's outfit posts without always saying 'I like that skirt' or 'those boots are cool' or whatever? I suppose what everyone else has said is true. Just find the blogs you love enough to comment on, and hopefully the audience will find you?
-Liz
Hey Meg! I am sorry that I missed this post, but better late than never right? Actually, sometimes I like missing my favorite bloggers posts because then I get to read a whole bunch at once and that is kind of awesome.
I agree with you about the commenting. I honestly try to make an effort to respond to people, but yes, there are some that are just spam and I ignore them. I make the effort to check out their blog and if I like it, I follow.
I do try to respond to those that comment every single day because then I just feel bad I guess, and I respond. I think the only person that I don't leave real comments to all the time is Lauren. Sometimes I just write "poop" because it was something that we have already talked about or something.
I think this is why I take breaks from the blog. People are effing annoying. I honestly have tried to find different types of blogs because some fashion bloggers are such snots. Like those people who are outside in a bloody leotard and heels in the snow with nothing else on. Really? You expect me to believe that you wore that all damn day? Or those who just take outfit pics and then don't actually wear the clothes. I don't know, to me it seems a little dumb to do that.
Sorry that my comment is a rant, but sometimes rants are good right?
PS- I have never seen you in anything not adorable. I think that you could wear Kyle's uniform for McD's and still be cute. But then maybe I am just bias? I think that you are an awesome and adorable person :)
Well. I genuinely enjoy reading your blog and the blogs I follow.
I generally comment because... I have something to say or I want someone to know what I think about their post/them.
But at the same time... people with no followers (aka almost me) have no other way for people to /ever/ find or read their blog.
Just out of curiosity, how did you begin blogging? Did you just type away hoping someone would find your blog by chance?
I don't disagree with you, generic, transparent comments are insulting and pointless. But when people (well... I) comment on blogs I guess I do /hope/ that people will take a look at mine.
That being said, I don't dispair when they don't :)
PPS
I actually really like this outfit!
Post a Comment